i'm not afraid of the quiet

Hello friends! Its nice to be back here...thinking about connecting with everyone again. I'm not sure about you, but this new normal has me on a rollercoaster. One day, I am fine. I function as if it is my usual day off, yes even midweek. But then I hit a spell where the lack of movement unsettles me. We are all experiencing the very same feelings, just in our own ways. This I know. I don't have advice for you. That's never why I write. I think I write to give myself advice. 

I was talking with a friend recently, sharing our laments and joys through all of this, and we both decided there are parts of us that have needed attention that we had been too busy to address. I don't just mean we should go for a run, or take a walk, or for the love of all that's good, put down that sixth cookie you've snuck from the freezer today. But I mean, the things on the inside that are easy to ignore when on chauffeur duty, or working, or the daily grind that was our life up until about five weeks ago. But guess what? The quiet gives us room to breathe into that. To explore what's in our heads that we try not to deal with. Now we have no excuse. Perhaps you've been feeling that nudge also...

I'm certainly not saying that you should tackle things you're not ready to. But perhaps, consider the possibility of picking one thing. One habit. One vice. One goal. One thought that is not productive. That negative voice in your head that tells you you're not good enough, or that challenges you. Pick that thing. My guess is you're already thinking of it. You've probably thought of it as you've read this and pushed it aside several times already. Yes, that one. Pick that, and turn it around. Find some quiet in your home today. Or if you're in upstate NY as I am, you can go outside in the crazy wild wind and let it rush over you. Focus on why that thing is there. And turn it around. Turn your weakness into strength. Face it head on. Embrace it. And then, find some joy in the quiet...its the only place that allows you to get this work done. No TV. No music. Just you. Yourself. Your effort. Show up for yourself. Make an effort to make today better than yesterday, even if just for the ten or fifteen minutes you devote to yourself. Focus. Center. Reflect. Redirect. Energize. Express gratitude. Forgive. I'm not sure what it is you need to do, but today, I'm not afraid of the quiet...and you shouldn't be either. 

I am working on new music. I hoped to record this spring, but in light of all the things going on, that's not a certainty. But know that I am trying to tell it from where I am, and I hope to get that new music to you soon. 

Be well, and these blogs will be more frequent these days...I hope you keep reading. 

Love to all,

j

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